It just has to be tough to have geeky parents (I hear my husband saying ‘speak for yourself’). No, really, we try so hard, too hard, and our poor children are doomed to geekhood. They need a dirty-rotten-uncle to keep things balanced.
The second day of 1st grade, I was having a pleasant dinner with my children. They were asking all sorts of questions, as usual, and we meandered over to the subject of poop. It is a weighty topic for the 3 to 6 year old set. They wanted to know where poop goes when you flush.
It is a good question, and not the first time that they asked. I explained the sewer system. I explained sewage treatment plants. I explained that, ultimately, it becomes earth again and is great fertilizer for plants.
“Plants eat poop?”
“Good thing you aren’t a tree, huh?” I said.
“Gross, Mom!” (Every once in awhile, you need to get a “Gross, Mom!” just to make sure you aren’t too much of a nerd).
We had covered all of this before. Finally, I told them that we also benefit from what the trees don’t need. They give of carbon dioxide . . . I went on . . . .
“So, I guess you could say that we breathe tree farts.” Yes, I really said that. Seems even more ridiculous to actually write it, trust me.
They looked at me. No laughter. No “Gross Mom!” I was thinking that I really missed the boat this time. Come on, that HAS to be funny to a six year old. I’m not that lame.
“What’s a fart, Mom?”
Factoid: Today would be my great aunt’s birthday. If she were still with us, she would be 110 years old.